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Victims (August 4, 2004)

Posted on 2005.07.05 at 08:08
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Ok, so I thought my rants were finished for the day, but apparently they aren't. Just a warning though, this post is makes NO attempt to be gentle about how I present this information and you may be offended by it. Hopefully it's not too harsh...

There is the belief that we choose to come here to learn and grow and that we choose what lessons we are focusing on in this lifetime. Now, I do not believe this means we throw free will out the window and I do not feel that this means we plan out every detail of our lives. However, I do think this means that events will occur to help steer us down the path we wanted to go and to keep us from choosing another. However, since we have free will we can go where we want and other's will do the same. Sometimes this is good and sometimes not. Especially since we do not come here with the knowledge of what that path is. We may discover it, and we may not, but ultimately what matters is the process...did we grow during this life.

The reason for this post is because I am very very very VERY sick of hearing how people are victims. That mentality is not only wrong, but it is damaging to the human spirit. And it PISSES ME OFF!! I'm not saying anyone deserves to be raped, beaten, killed, starved, etc. What I AM saying is that it is YOUR choice in how you deal with it. Do you let it destroy you and seek sympathy and pity from others? Or do you decide to embrace the situations with love and free yourself from the pain? This doesn't mean you're a doormat and stay in an abusive relationships. Obviously you try to avoid situations that would make you vunerable to such attacks, but if they do happen, it is YOUR choice as to if you are a victim or not. Personally, if someone hurts me, I deal with it and move on. Otherwise, I have only given more power to what that person has done and more reason for that person to continue to hurt others. Now, if I truly want these events to stop, why would I do something that would prepetuate the occurrance of them?

Now, yes, there is the matter of dealing with grief and trauma. But what matters is your mindset...if you decide things will never be the same and life is over...you're right. And the person responsible for that death is you because you have now made the conscious effort NOT to deal with things. The truth when you get down to it is that nothing is ever the same. You cannot step into the same river twice...the moment is gone and the river has changed. Such is the case with life, but that does not mean that change is bad. You can decide to make it bad, or you can decide to deal with it and make things better. What bothers me about all this, regardless of what you believe about spirits or souls or anything else, is that the people who claim that this viewpoint is extremely wrong and claim to be victims are refusing to take responsibilty for their own actions. You aren't responsible for the actions of another and that is never your fault. However, you are responsible for how you handle a situation and if you pass this responsibility off on someone else you are not only pushing yourself further away from healing, but you are telling others that it's ok to do the same.

I dunno about everyone else, but I control myself, no one else does. You can do things to me but I am still me. I may change or see things differently, but I am still me. And before I get flamed for this post...which is ok if you disagree...this is comming from my own personal experience. I've tried being a victim...and I got sick of listening to myself. The ONLY way I found peace was through forgiveness, self love and releasing the anger, fear and pain that trapped me into thinking someone else had enough power to control who I was inside. Each person has a very beautiful inner light, but often when hide it under layers of insecurity, uncertainty and irresponsibility. Once we face who we really are, we can move forward and become the people we have always been. Regardless of if you have a traumatic experience or not...be who you are. You are strong enough to be yourself. Do not give someone else the power to convince you otherwise. Heal yourself with love, for no one else can make you whole. Strip away this lie and live your life for yourself by following your heart.

Ok, feel free to flame me! ^^

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