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wish-TB

Updates...Rants...Realizations

Posted on 2011.07.17 at 09:28
Current Music: Du Hast ~Rammstein
Tags: , ,
Last night I revised the introduction of my story. It was a bit disjointed and I think it flows much better now. Which means I'm almost through the first section on my outline. It also means I'm approaching a part I have yet to write. I'm trying to decide how much time to spend on that section as it takes two years of the characters' lives, but it's a very minor point in the plot. In fact it's so minor that after I explain what they are training for, I could pretty much skip over it without anything being lost. I'm thinking maybe just a scene or two and that's it, or maybe some flashbacks.

On another note I'm a little annoyed at the fanfiction community, not that it's some huge surprise or anything. I found a legit pairing and could not find a single work with them in it. There was a good chunk of fiction out there, some of it with pairings and ratings I found disturbing. I really don't understand how fans pair two characters sometimes. Typically I prefer canon pairings although there are a few non-canon ones I like--but they work for those characters. It isn't like I'm completely pulling two characters that would never even be friends together. To each their own, but I'm not going to read it; and I did not. I was just disgusted with the amount of wtfwhy!? pairings vs. the utter lack of fiction for this legit one. So I gave it a shot, albeit a rather crappy one, and decided I prefer writing about my own characters.

In editing that entry however, I discovered that yes indeed my language skills are deteriorating. My sentence structure in English mimics that in French and Japanese half the time and I have to go back and edit it. Moreover, my brain is now filling in completely different words without me being aware of it until I go back and reread it. Like I seriously typed "hot" instead of "on" in this entry. Combining the two makes me sound like English isn't my first language. It's annoying. Why would my sentence structure be better in other languages than my first one? But to misplace adjectives and adverbs, or to use the noun version instead of the adverb? It is really frustrating and must make it confusing to read. It also doesn't help that I can be listening or speaking in English and be hearing or thinking in a different language. Then when I go to read or write, my brain will occasionally flip to another language--even though the words I'm reading are in English. It results in a lot of spelling errors and weird looks when I pronounce a known English word as if it was Japanese romanji. It's getting worse.

It honestly makes me want to study more about the brain. I've studied a lot about language acquisition and want to do my Masters work in comparing it to music acquisition, as to me they are quite similar despite using different parts of the brain. I also know when I have a migraine aura my sentence structure goes completely weird. I will do really weird things like put the subject at the end or use the right words just in some random order. The neurologist said it was just how the aura affected my brain, but there really wasn't anything to do about it. Still, I don't think what I'm experiencing on a regular basis is a migraine aura. I remember speaking to a Linguist and he said there was a switch of sorts in the brain and we didn't always have control over when it flipped on or off. It's just getting really frustrating.

Something else that frustrates me...some of the people on this forum. Seriously. If you end your sentence with "if" there is something wrong with you. Honestly, where do these people come up with their "sentences" because even online translators that suck don't do that. And even with a migraine aura I'm not that bad. And I really want to know why they think their opinion is more valid than everyone else's opinion. It's a forum; it's for discussion and tossing out ideas, not to dismiss the ideas of others. Ah well...it takes all kinds I suppose.

On another note, I've noticed my journal falls into three categories for my entries: rants, story updates, reflective inspiration. Probably a good thing not many people know it exists or read it. I've also learned I have a strong affinity for industrial music, or more specifically, music that uses that sound for its beat. It does have to have a certain level of sophistication to it beyond just that sound, but I'm finding I like the gritty, rough edge it gives. It would be quite amusing if my boss, or students, ever went through my playlist on my iPod. It'd probably go something like Muse-Moody Blues-Rammstein-Youko Kanno-Depeche Mode-Rie Fu-Pink Floyd-Corelli-Gershwin-Tori Amos-Lupe Fiasco.

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